Love After Divorce
By Jules Wyman
On the surface, divorce usually happens due to a systematic breakdown in communication between partners. But if we scratch a little deeper, we find that there are other forces at play - the disintegration of a marriage is a reflection of spiritual isolation.
Divorcing from a partner has a very high psychic cost aside from the financial misery that so often accompanies this daily tragedy. Many people find themselves losing weight and losing their self-confidence very quickly. It is said that it takes a person six months for every year of marriage before they have reached any degree of healing. There is more truth to this than you might think, for it is not just our emotions and physical forms that need to heal we also need to recover on a psychic level.
This is evident in the thought patterns that accompany divorce. While there may be anger and resentment attached to a divorce, our thought patterns tend to reflect the progress with which spiritual wounds heal. Initially, a person might find themselves remembering the better moments of a relationship. At the same time, they are likely to ask themselves why, if things were so good, the relationship failed. The next stage is to trawl through the downsides of the marriage and to try and apportion blame. Finally, as the spirit heals, a person will be able to look at both the positives and negatives of the marriage and remember them with honesty and a feeling of acceptance. Psychic scars are much like physical ones. At first they hurt and we wonder how they happened and as they scab over we feel angry about the circumstances that caused them. Lastly, we embrace them as part of our physical form and are comfortable explaining how they happened.
Once a person has reached the final stage, it is almost as if they have reset their psychic clock. Although there are now scars, their fundamental spiritual make up has achieved a level of balance that is similar to the condition they were in before they embarked on their previous relationship. Once the scars have healed, a person has a greater acceptance of who they are and just what it is that they need from a partner. On a psychic level, this subtle change in confidence acts as a beacon, attracting other partners, adding credence to the adage Love always comes when you’re not looking for it.
While divorce is a painful and emotional process for all involved, it is part of another process that can lead to finding a more stable relationship. Psychic maturity is a huge part of any partnership and the way someone deals with the spiritual knocks that are thrown at them can impact positively on their future chances at finding the perfect partner.